Did I or didn't I tell you, I'm not interested in you, you old fart! I don't share your orientation, Uncle Paddy.I wouldn't even be interested if you were to be sexually reassigned and appear as Aunt Patricia. Hope I'm clear about this, you retarded fool.Because you're an uncle f*cker.
Get a sense of humour. Read more of Wilde and Wodehouse. Come up with witty repartees, Paddy.
P. S - You're good, Paddy. You really are. But as long as I'm around, you'd be second best. Might as well learn to live with the fact.